Cat School

Barkley, my cat, is a notorious pain in the butt. He does little things that drives everyone crazy. Generally, he is not affection and tends to look like he is being tortured if anyone tries to cuddle with him. But he is just so darn cute.

We have five chairs at the table, if one person does not sit quickly enough they will find my little black feline waiting for his own portions of the family meal. He is notorious in the house for snatching a steak or two when we took our eyes off of him.

So today he was fighting with Joe's cat. He tends to do this a lot but mainly when I am sleeping. Joe noticed him wiggle his little butt get ready to pounce on Chauncey.

He looked at me informed me that he was not the brightest cat in the world. Of course, as much as the cat seems to dislike me, he is still my cat so I rushed to his defense.

I informed Joe that he was a smart kitty and sweet(I was totally lying). Joe looked at me like I had lost my mind. We went back and fourth for a few minutes.

Taking his father's side, from the corner of the room Joey pops out with, "Mom, Barkley has never been to Cat School mom, he can't hold a pencil."

I guess he told me.

My Tantrum

I love blogging about my kids and the silly things they say and do. I find it entertaining and I think there is definitely an audience out there for silly kids stories. Plus with my memory, I need something I can look back and laugh at when they are in college.

I would be hypocritical if I did not share my own nutty moments as a parent. This one tonight was a big one and my children informed me I had to blog about because it is only fair. 

So Taylor and I are hitting the studying big time. She has two big tests on Wednesday, so we hit the ground running today. We started with Social Studies because that is my FAVORITE and considering I have a Master of Arts in Public Policy, there should be nothing I am not somewhat familiar with for the most part.

So we are in it, talking about Jamestown, the Contenintal Congress, Thomas Jefferson, and even some minor geography questions. 

We get to a section that wants Taylor to separate the rivers and the world oceans. Of course, I got this. I know that the Atlantic, Indian, and Artic are oceans. I am completely aware of the Rio Grande, the Mississippi and the Ohio are rivers.  Then we hit something I had never in my lifetime seen, the Southern. I automatically assumed it was a river because I just knew it was not an ocean. My daughter informed me that I was wrong, that the Southern was an actual ocean.

Now I wanted to argue and we went back and forth for five minutes. So I made my daughter google it. She read on google that..."the Southern Ocean was discovered......blah, blah, blah." I was incensed. Obviously if there was the alleged Southern Ocean, it was not "DISCOVERED" it was sectioned off and renamed it/ When did this happen? Was there a press release? I mean I went to college in from 2003 to 2007 at the great University of Florida and then 2009 to 2010 at New England College. How in the world was I unaware of this ocean?

It escalated after this  and there was me(an adult) arguing with Taylor that thing was not discovered it was renamed. Then suddenly Joey came out of his room with a study guide with the word Southern Ocean on it and joined the argument. Then Logan came out to join the chaos. My kids were just so excited their know-it-all mother was unaware of something.

After a few minutes of all four of us going back and forth, Joe tried to calm me down. He was enjoying this a lot. I was now getting angry. I started yelling that nothing was discovered, everyone knew the earth was round and the moon controlled the tides. No one suddenly discovered this piece of ocean that remained unseen by all humans since the invention of the satellite. I stomped through the house like a big baby and threaten to ground anyone who said the word discovered......Joe included.

Not my finest moment.

I did feel better later, I text two of my closest friends and they had never heard of this Southern Ocean. Both absolutely agreed it was not "discovered."

Joey: The Hot Dog Story

My son is a hot dog addict. He always has been from the time I cut up little hot dogs for him when he was a little guy until now when he orders hot dogs every last time we go out to eat.

He asked for corn dogs for lunch today. So after he finished up his favorite meal, he asked me an unexpected question.

"Mom, are hot dogs and corn dogs made out of dogs??"

Everyone kinda stopped for a second and just looked at him. "What did he say?" my husband responded.

"He just asked me if his hot dogs were made out of dogs."

I explained to my doe-eyed child that of course they were not made out of dogs.Then I asked the obvious question.

"Who told you that?"

"Taylor," he said kicking his sister directly under the bus.

All eyes turned to Taylor. And of course she denied it. So for two minutes we went back and forth arguing over who did or did not say what to Joey.

Joey looked at me and informed me that he cried when he found out.

There was only one thing left to find out.

"Joey, why if you thought they were made out of dogs, did you still eat the hot dogs?" I asked.

"Because mom they are yummy."